Inane trivia & How to use it...

It's tough being a general knowledge freak. You get loads of ridiculous information amongst the few gems which you can actually use in life.. stuff which has no practical use in life and you just try to work into conversation to act smart ( Why, Yes, honey. I am from Kerala where the main language is Malayalam, umm..just like English is for England... speaking of which DID YOU KNOW that the longest word in the English language is Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis.. honey ? umm, hon ? Hello ? )

But you know what ? I disagree. Every fact, no matter how insignificant, has some relevance somewhere, right ? I figured I'd try to bring more colour to these dreary facts of life so that you can use 'em .. you know, just to show the rest of the gang who's the 'real smart dude / dudette'. Or the real geek.
N.B. While there a million other irrelevant data waiting to be swallowed up, I've only hunted and added ones I knew before I started this post.


So adopt a nice nasal kiddy voice and whine along with me...

DID YOU KNOW the song - Happy birthday to you - is under copyright & the copyright runs out in 2010. ( Consider that on an average, 9 million people have their birthdays on any given day.. doncha think you should be at that auction bidding for the rights in 2010 now )
DID YOU KNOW the ghosts in Pac-Man are named Inky, Blinky, Pinky, and Clyde. ( God save me, I knew this one. Incidentally, If you can work this into a conversation, you're sure to get the girl. Provided she's punch drunk and doesn't speak English )
DID YOU KNOW Marilyn Monroe had six toes. ( funny, isn't it ? Most of you guys would have stared / ogled / drooled over her pics, yet noone noticed her toes . Just what were you looking at, you horny goats ?? )

DID YOU KNOW that when you break down love, it's all just about dopamine, adrenaline and serotonin ( Ain't you all glad I don't work for Hallmark greetings ? )
DID YOU KNOW If you are "a universal donor" , you have ...( fill in the blanks ) **answer at end of this section
DID YOU KNOW hair, prompted by testosterone, grows faster in men in anticipation of sex. ( which probably explains why most married men are bald, huh ? )
DID YOU KNOW every time you sneeze some of your brain cells die. ( Hahaha.. Now let me see you giggle away the sniffles. )
DID YOU KNOW The two highest IQ's ever recorded (on a standard test) both belong to women. ( Hmmmph... Well, sure, but could they cook ? )
DID YOU KNOW The vocabulary of the average person consists of 5,000 to 6,000 words. ( of course, when you ask the guy for the first time if he loves you, the average vocabulary is 4 words - "gulp .umm.. uhh...huh ?" / I donta speak engalish / what was the question again / I gotta go " ..thats 16 words divided by the main four options equals...4. Ramanujan, eat my shorts. )
** [ "Blood Group O" is the right answer, "herpes" the most popular ]

DID YOU KNOW a South African monkey was once awarded a medal and promoted to the rank of corporal during World War I. ( hence the tradition in India where we elect chimps and apes into Parliament. Damn you Gandhi for your South African bred ideas. )
DID YOU KNOW Mexican jumping beans jump because of a moth larva inside the bean. ( Of course, they do the Macarena because they still believe it's cool. )
DID YOU KNOW India has a Bill of Rights for cows. ( Is anyone really surprised at that ? )

DID YOU KNOW that Nagoya tebasaki is an unusual ice cream - Japanese chicken wing ice cream. Of course you can wash it down with 'Calpis water' - that's chilled cow urine. ( Umm... I'm on a diet but you guys go right ahead. )
DID YOU KNOW The world's costliest coffee is made from the droppings of a type of marsupial that eats only the very best coffee beans. Plantation workers track them and scoop their precious poop. ( suddenly that cheap 3 rupee coffee seems so nice..)
DID YOU KNOW the dot over the letter 'i' is called a tittle. ( Do not try the "you've got a cute tittle, gal" line.. there is no documented episode of it ending well. )
DID YOU KNOW Squids can commit suicide by eating their own tentacles. ( I said TENTACLES, you nimwit, not TESTI.. aww, what's the point ? Once a perv, always a perv )
DID YOU KNOW that the electric chair was invented by a dentist. ( the electric chair and the dentist's chair - another perfect example of the phrase "between the devil and the deep sea" )

DID YOU KNOW that octopus balls lie in their head ? ( Which means if you see them scratching their head, they're not puzzled, just.. itchy down there. )
DID YOU KNOW Porcupines float in water!. ( Nevertheless, they do not make nice life rafts..how do I know ? shut up and pass me the tweezer )
DID YOU KNOW that sea horses are the only males that become pregnant ? ( They are also exclusively monogamous, but I don't think they do the dishes and squeeze the toothpaste from back to front, so guys, we're safe. For now. )
DID YOU KNOW the male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off. ( cheer them, respect them, adore them, but please - leave the stunts to them. WOMEN, please do not try this at home. )
DID YOU KNOW Snails mate only once in their lifetime, but it can take up to 12 hours. ( It has to be the Xtra Long Lasting condoms they use, right ? )

Hopefully, all these articles will make people look upto you in a crowd once you work it into conversation.. either that or you'll have a lot of free arm space while having your lunch in the cafeteria.. hmmm.

Now that's what I call a win-win situation !!




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11 comments

  1. Hahahaha.. Really, you are the most funny person evaaar

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  2. tell mua somethin i dont know!!!!

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  3. Yes yes I knew some of them B-)

    And brain cells die .. tht's one of the reasons why we say "Bless You" when someone sneezes :-D

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  4. are i posted something.. dont knwo where it go.
    well here it goes again..
    it sounds like a new reborn terminator .. bt this time in heaven and hell ;-)

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  5. sigh..payal.. i believe ur referring to the post above.. 2nd person who got lost.. man, this really is a broken road!!!

    and loon gal, welcome to geeks anonymous!!!

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  6. amazing facts and hilarious tag lines.....


    have a sneaking suspicion that some of them have been picked up...coz they target women.....!!!

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  7. :) hope u hvent taken copy right on those facts becoz i just found out wht i can talk abt in the next party, where usually i sit quite by the bar...u , my man, has created a monster...

    by the way, did u know that women has testicles tht are dormant and is called an ovary ?

    no? neither did i, i just made tht up...hopefully in the midst of ur facts, this will go unnoticed and we can start a rumour

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  8. i've loved the facts and the taggings with it. incredible. you're undoubtely blessed with this sense of humor.

    thankyou for sharing and i hope this is not copyrighted?

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  9. Anonymous5:00 PM

    I am reading this article second time today, you have to be more careful with content leakers. If I will fount it again I will send you a link

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  10. Anonymous8:51 PM

    Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now. Keep it up!
    And according to this article, I totally agree with your opinion, but only this time! :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. Anonymous8:23 PM

    Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now. Keep it up!
    And according to this article, I totally agree with your opinion, but only this time! :)

    ReplyDelete

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